Thursday, May 31, 2007

What's Happened So Far ....

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Episode III: “Come On Baby Light My Fire”

So the original plan for Memorial Day was to drive down to Seward and go camping for the weekend. We (Me and Tammy) were going to leave on Saturday. Here is what really happened:

Friday night – went to a house warming party for Dallas, got my hands on a Wii (Video Game Player) and was instantly sucked through the vortex to another dimension. This thing is so cool (Dear Santa I want one!) There is this cow riding game thingy and I would like to think that I look cooler playing it then Alexis did but I’m sure by the way the other people were laughing we both looked equally ridiculous.

Saturday – Slept until noon (because for some reason I can’t go to bed until really late – my clock is screwed up). Woke up called Tammy asked about driving down to Seward informed her I had to go get my tires changed over before I get pulled over and get a huge ass fine I can’t afford. She had talked to the peeps who were already down there and it was overcast and rainy (Check Please!) no thanks we decided to pass and think about maybe going down on Sunday. We decide that we need food and get a group of people together to go to dinner at the Moose’s Tooth (If Tammy doesn’t get a secret discount she should). While at dinner we decide we are going to go out and that possibly there might be a BBQ at my house on Sunday. I decide I can’t go out to Platinum Jaxx looking like a Hobo (I do have some standards) so I head back to my house to change. I dress in my trendy skinny jeans and this cool black top I have never worn before and I thought I looked fabulous! Off we go (Tammy, Ashlee and me) we end up running in to a CRAZY friend of the other two. Well most of you know me and I can tolerate most people but this girl was grating and was ruining my shiny buzz – she had to go. Frankly she should not have been drinking anyway – BYE BYE crazy chick! Later we move to Kootz and proceed to get our drink and dance on. Ashlee does an impersonation of “Shadow Dancer” and gets all grindy in the cage at the club. Much drunkenness ensues and Sam comes and gets us to take us home.

Sunday – Slept until almost 2:00 tried to wake up at 10:00 (to clean house for fictional BBQ that could become reality) upon waking at 10 endured such head spinning that body naturally kicked in with self preservation technique and lapsed back into blissful unconsciousness (had loverly dream about Wii cows). When I awoke the 2nd time spinning was blessedly gone and my day was shiny again. Looked around house decide close personal friends not worthy of me cleaning house, stalked off to meet Sam at Costco to get food. People came we ate and drank (Pictures to be posted on MySpace at a later date) had a toxic fire in an old oil barrel that was once part of a trebuchet that now has no counter weight and then we decide to sacrifice remaining burning parts of trebuchet to toxic fire. Trebuchet? What Trebuchet (Wahahahaha)! Alexis crashed at my house and totally hogged the bed.

Monday – SLEPT ALL DAY! Pretty sure I woke up and picked up Tammy to take her to her car.

P.S. Went to shrink today. Good news not crazy over active brain though – Never had that problem before.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Episode II: “Laundry & Sober Karaoke”

To start off I am wearing clean underwear today. However the laundry is only half done and my (male) roommate moved my laundry from the washer into the dryer and then into a basket. Normally you would think that this is a guy being helpful and doing something without being asked. However I am extremely obsessive when it comes to my laundry. My whites have to be washed twice – once with Oxy Clean and then again with bleach and detergent. This is slightly anal but I like my whites to glow in the dark. Also half of my clothes get hung up to dry because I am a tall bitch and I don’t want anything to shrink. So imagine my horror when I found my whites done and put in the basket in my room. I still haven’t gone through the basket because I’m scared of what I will find.

Last night went out for Karaoke – had to support a friend not that I was actually going to sing. However when there is actually a competition it’s not bad to watch sort of an American idol feel and most people were stone cold sober – who would have thought.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Episode I: "Bird on a wire"

I am so horribly tired right now. Last night I had a message that it was my friend Lance’s birthday and they were having a get together at Kootz at 10:00 (Yeah! Like I plan on dragging my ass out of the house that late), well since it’s a “school night” and I never go out during the week I decided I wasn’t going. Then at 11:00 Lance’s wife (Celeste) calls me (Apparently the guys are all talking about me and how they haven’t seen much of me in awhile – that’s what happens when both your bartenders from different bars are in the same room together – so the speculation begins, am I working more hours? Do I have a new boyfriend?) then Lance gets on the phone and guilt’s me (“It’s my birthday!” Plus I think I might have to defend my own honor.) in to going so I get to the bar at 11:30. I decide of course I am only staying an hour (barely enough time to get sawdust between my toes – thanks to the birdhouse). Well all the girls leave at midnight and that leaves me to give the birthday boy a ride home (we were going to leave at 12:30 – but boys kept showing up and I wasn’t about to be the party pooper in front of that many boys – “Suck it up beotch! It’s not like on these drugs you can sleep anyway!). So for two hour it’s me and a group of guys (One or two completely do-able) Needless to say I did not get home until 3:00am and the alarm started going off at 6:30. My ass is dragging hard core today and I just want to go to bed. Not to mention I just went to the chiropractor yesterday and will need to see him again this week cause I threw my back out trying to look all cute and sexy with a telephone pole up my ass (the bar swears it’s a stool) and then to angle myself because the bar itself is slanted. Completely horrifying! All in all I continue to be the queen of the “one of the guys club” – here’s to hoping!

P.S. – Lance called me this morning and thanked me all chipper like to for putting up with him and taking him home. Ugh! Asshat don’t talk to me until I get another 10 hours of sleep! Sorry I was mean this morning Lance.

P.P.S. – Those of you that truly know me are shocked that I went out on a weeknight! I know perhaps this is the beginning of my downward spiral – look mom no hands!

P.P.S.S. – OK slight angular spiral in the left hand direction I had one drink and then drank water for the last two and a half hours – not exactly the makings of a devious criminal master mind.

P.P.P.S.S. – Despite my bitching I really did have a great time and everything is shiny.

Side Note: I am down to my last pair of clean underwear I need to do laundry tonight or it will be commando style for me. Yo Adrian!