Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Episode XXXIV: “Rub A Dub Dub just me in the Tub.”

OK so to be honest I had a shitty day yesterday and all I could think about for the last half of my work day was that I really just wanted to go home and take a bath. However I have a regular size bathtub and well cramming a six foot frame into it isn’t as relaxing as it sounds. So I called up Lexie’s parents and informed them I would pay them to allow me to come over and invade their home and most especially their big ass tub. What was that I’m family so I can come over (HA – I’m back in the will Lexie).

So once I lower myself into the hot water and my legs were straight and every part of my body was actually under water a sigh escaped my lips and yes I bit my lip and made the “O” face. Then not to be out done by Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman I went all the way under and I guess I was too relaxed because all of the sudden water is rushing up my nose and I’m drowning in someone bath tub WTF! (So not my day!) I come sputtering up and now my nose burns (but Hey my sinuses are cleaned out). Well I relax again and begin to almost float (with my face above water). Then Lexie comes in and asks if I want ice cream. Ice Cream while sitting in the bath – HELL YES – MAY I HAVE ANOTHER! I am a celebrity you will worship me and in preparation for that day Lexie also took a picture of me with my ice cream in the tub and then something happened and the picture got sent somewhere – of course it won’t surface until I become famous then it will be splashed all over the internet. Currently this photo resides on my phone and will be brought out at drunk moments, YeHaw! Whatever once I was done with my soak and had turned fully into a prune. I left Lexie at her parents and went home.

When I die please bury me in that tub.

P.S. Lexie’s parents are in my will (you will get a whole 5 cents each) – I will forever owe you.


Anonymous said...

You all should have seen her FREAK trying to stop the sending of the picture and then trying to figure out where it went...hilllllariouse!!! Oh and I have seen her swim, but damn she almost drown in the tub. Again...Hilllllariouse!

AlaskaMe said...

Well I'm glad I was amusing! I could have died and your mother would have been totally grossed out if i died in her tub. HA!